>I was taking my afternoon nap when there was a loud knock on the cabin door. “Security!” yelled out a voice. “Hide the tortillas!” I yelled, scrambling to put my food somewhere, anywhere out of sight. “Security” the voice yells again. “Porthole!”

I realize what’s happening. Today we will be in pirate infested waters, the gulf of Aden, between Yemen and Somalia. They closed all the portholes as a precaution, and none of us are allowed to go onto the promenade deck or outside on the lower decks today.

I stare at my closed porthole. Pirates! I really, really want to open it to take a look. “Imagine if the pirates came in my porthole?!” I started.. Sherwin: “You know they’re not pirates like that, they’re just casual..” Me: “I realize Johnny Depp won’t be crawling through my porthole anytime soon.. Anyways, if they’re casual they can’t come in. It’s Informal night tonight.”

Pirates have seized more than 24 ships in this area in the past year. I don’t think we have an ultrasonic weapon like the Seabourn ship had, so I might just have to pull out the Accordion if they come near. Rumour has it that the Captain is up on the bridge right now with a gun.

I am quite happy to announce that Pirates did not deter the Bridge Players,

The Pool Floaters,

It did not cancel the Sextet’s pool set (much to their chagrin)

Nor did the Pirates even get a chance to be offended by this blatant display of Americanism:

The American Buffet

Mmmmmm, Beef Brisket… Do Pirates eat this?

Take a look around – Do YOU see any Pirates?

Yikes, I just heard a thump underneath my porthole. I hope it’s just the waves…

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5 Responses to >Arrrrrrrrrrr…

  1. Goofball says:

    >wow…do the passengers know why the portholes and lower decks have been closed??how would closed portholes help against pirates anyway?

  2. >I guess they could lob grenades through the portholes? No Johnny Depp characters? Pirating just ain’t what it used to be.

  3. >As an afterthought, I heard on the CBC news that a ship had been captured and boarded by pirates off the coast of Somalia yesterday. I think your captain should think about installing some Big Guns.., maybe some Exocet missiles…

  4. Goofball says:

    >I heard about the ship getting captured as well and had to think of you! what a scary place to have to go by! Yikes.

  5. >I’d rather be safe too! One ship which came into port in Vancouver had some warning equipment on it.. I thought of pirates etc..IT’s a little scarier to see the area where they have been frequenting!

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